By Chantelle Znideric
It’s the night before their first day. The offer letter is printed, the train times are checked twice, and three outfits are laid across the bed. None of them feels right.
They’ve read the welcome pack. It says “dress for your day.” It says “use your judgement.” But judgement comes from experience, and this is someone who has never worked in an office, never met a client, never sat in a room full of professionals and had to figure out whether they belong there.
So they lie awake. Not thinking about the job they were hired to do. Thinking about what to wear.
After 20 years as a personal stylist, I’ve heard this story more times than I can count. And the question I’d love every HR director to ask themselves is a simple one: do you remember how you felt on your first day?
The Hidden Cost of Not Knowing
This year’s graduates are entering a tough market. Youth unemployment stands at 16.4%, and graduate job postings are at their lowest level for this time of year since 2020. When opportunities are this hard to win, the pressure to make the right first impression is enormous.
That pressure doesn’t disappear once the contract is signed. It moves into the first weeks of the job. Graduates spend energy reading the room, copying colleagues and second-guessing every choice. Energy that should be going into learning, contributing and building relationships.
Employers are noticing the effects, even if they don’t always connect them to the cause. The Institute of Student Employers’ 2025 survey found more than half of graduate employers said new hires fell short on self-awareness, and concerns about resilience had risen sharply on the year before. Graduate retention after three years has fallen to its lowest point since records began.
Confidence, belonging and presence aren’t soft extras. They shape how quickly someone speaks up in a meeting, how naturally they connect with their team, and whether they still want to be with you in three years’ time.
When Nobody Has Shown You the Codese
Every workplace has unwritten rules. A Social Mobility Commission study into investment banking found that something as small as wearing brown shoes with a business suit could count against a candidate. That rule might seem outdated now, which is exactly the problem. The codes keep shifting. Nobody writes them down. You either know them or you don’t.
Graduates from professional families tend to pick them up at home. Some parents are now paying private coaches to teach their children the unwritten rules of work. But many of the graduates you hire are the first in their family to step into a corporate career. There’s no one at the kitchen table to ask what “business casual” means at a law firm, or what to wear to a first client meeting.
This is close to my heart. I was adopted from Indonesia and grew up in Devon, where I was told at school I’d never find a creative career. My parents weren’t corporate professionals, so there was no rulebook at home. When I started my business and went networking for the first time, I walked into a room full of stuffy professionals who didn’t give me the time of day. What got me through it was the outfit I’d chosen to wear. It gave me the confidence to hold my head up, to rise above it, to move on. Style was how I found my footing. When nothing else was on my side, I felt good in my clothes. That was enough to keep going.
When we leave graduates to work it out alone, we quietly reward those who already had a head start. That sits uncomfortably alongside the social mobility commitments so many firms have made.
Hybrid Working Has Blurred the Picture for Everyone
When I began working with corporate clients in 2006, the dress code was simple. A suit and tie for men, a trouser suit or formal dress for women. Today the rules have relaxed almost everywhere, and I think that freedom is genuinely good. But freedom without guidance can feel like a test with no answers.
Many of today’s graduates spent part of their education online. They’ve had few chances to see how people present themselves at work. A typical week might now include an office day, a client visit, a team social and several video calls, each with its own unspoken expectations. I hear from experienced managers and senior leaders who feel just as unsure as they did on their first day. Graduates are simply where the uncertainty shows most clearly.
What Saying Nothing Costs
Nobody tells the new joiner what good looks like, so the first time the subject comes up is when something has gone wrong. A line manager has an awkward word after a client meeting. A partner mentions it in passing. Worst of all, it gets talked about behind the graduate’s back before anyone speaks to them directly.
For the graduate, the result is the same. Knocked confidence. A feeling of being judged rather than supported. A lingering sense that they don’t quite belong.
The Institute of Student Employers has made the point plainly: if the way people present themselves matters to you, tell them. What feels obvious to you may not be obvious to someone from a different background or generation. Clarity is kindness. It removes the guesswork before it becomes an awkward conversation.
A Better First Chapter
I believe professional presence belongs in onboarding. Not as a dress code memo, but as genuine support that helps people feel at ease before they walk through the door.
That’s why I created STRIBE Belonging, a graduate presence programme for organisations that welcome new cohorts every year. It isn’t about telling people what to wear. It’s about giving them a style guide, helping them understand your culture, and letting them show up as their authentic best selves, with real confidence rather than conformity.
Graduates receive it before their first day:
- A tailored style guide built around your organisation’s culture, sectors and client expectations, so graduates and managers share one clear visual reference
- 20 short training videos released gradually from pre-start through the first month, covering first impressions, building a small affordable wardrobe, dressing for client meetings and video calls, and personal brand
- A live presence session with me as an optional add-on, in person or virtual
The benefits reach well beyond what anyone wears. Graduates focus on their work, not their wardrobe. Managers are spared those awkward conversations. From day one, you see the real person you hired. And you send a clear message to new joiners, and to the graduates you hope to attract next year, that says we invest in you, and we want you to belong here.
Every Graduate Should Walk in Feeling They Belong
The graduates you hire this year are capable, talented and ready to contribute. Many of them simply haven’t been given the information others take for granted.
Offering style and presence support before day one removes a barrier that has quietly held people back for years. It costs far less than losing a graduate you worked hard to recruit.
If you lead graduate or early careers recruitment and you’d like to explore how STRIBE Belonging could support your next intake, I’d love to have a short conversation. Find out more at personal-stylist.co.uk/stribe.
And I’m curious, do you remember how you felt on your first day? What do you think your graduates wish they’d known before theirs?
Chantelle Znideric is an award-winning personal stylist and founder of STRIBE, a corporate style and presence programme. Find out more at personal-stylist.co.uk.
